Doctor Jokes

Khuda end docter ko kabhi naraj nahi karna chahiye,
Kyonki khuda naraj aadmi docter ke paas,
Docter naraj to aadmi khuda ke paas! 

Doctors After Operation and Students After Exam Both tell the Same Answer
.
.
.
.
.
We Tried Our Best
Can’t Say Anything Right Now!

A man to doctor:
Is there any medicine for long life..?
Doctor: Get married..!!
Man: Will it help ?
Doctor: No, but it will avoid such thoughts!!

Munna: Ae Circuit ye Dr. log opration se pehle
patient ko behosh kyun karte hai?
Circuit: Bhai! Bole to patient opration sikh gaya
to Dr. Logo ki to wat lag jayegi na.

 At Indian railway station
an American doctor got heart attack
after reading a book’s name..

 How to become a Doctor in 30 days?
MRP Rs.20!!

Doctor: Kaise Aana Hua?
Santa: Doc Sab, Tabiyat Theek Nahi hai, Liver mein Pain ho raha hai
Doc: Daroo Peete ho??
Santa: Haan, Par Chhota Peg hi Banana.

 A man asked: Dr. banne mein kitna kharcha aata hai.

An Interesting answer from Medical Student:
Paisa to kam kharch hota hai,
Par JAWANI puri kharch ho jaati hai.

Dr: Jab aapko pata tha chipkali aapke
naak mein ja rahi hai to aapne roka kyub nahi?

Patient: Pehle cockroch gya tha,
maine socha use pakdne jaa rahi hogi..!!

 After a consult, the doctor says:
I’ve got good news Misses Darwin
Lady: Miss Darwin….
Doctor: Oh… Then I have bad news Miss Darwin.

Dr to Ash’s baby in hospital
Dr.: who is ur grandpa?
Baby: Big B
Dr.: Who is ur Mom?
Baby: Miss World
Dr.: who is ur father?
Baby: No idea sir jee

Dr: Roz 5km walk karo, to 1 sal me 50kg wajan kum ho jayega..
1 sal bad santa phone pe:
Wajan to kam ho gaya,
magar saale ghar kaise jau 1825km door aa gaya hu.

Agar doctors film banate to unki filmo ke naam ye hote
- X-Ray Ho Na Ho
- Kaho Na Bukhar Hai
- Hum Blood De Chuke Sanam
- Mere Yaar Ka Operation Hai
- Kash Aap Hamare Patient Hote
- Main Dettol Ki Diwani Hon
- Hamara Thermometer Aap K Pass Hai
- Kabhi Drip Kabhi Injection
- Zakham To Hona Hi Tha

 Amma- Doctor shahab mera beta Bike se gir gaya,
Dr.- I don’t no hindi plz tell me in ENG.
Amma- My londa gironda from Hero-Honda,
broken haddi ker de patti

        Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom and stayed there. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
.
       When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital as he now considered her to be mentally stable. When he went to tell Mary the news he said, "Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he's dead."
.
Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry."




                                                                Next Page >>